My Mother, Crystal Harkey

The worst regret in life is not taking advantage of the time you have with someone and telling them how you feel. I would like to think that I cherished many moments with my mother. Crystal Harkey, my mother, died of cancer in October of 2009. Tonight I would like to honor my mother by telling you what kind of person she was and what she did that affected my life in so many ways.

My mother worked 29 years at Stanly Community College as a grant writer and resource development supervisor. She was nearing retirement when she developed cancer and had to quit working. She was the most well-known person around campus and she made a new friend everyday. My mother loved everyone, and everyone loved my mother. (Chiasmus) My mom was easy to talk to and people just enjoyed her company. She was sweet and kind but when the President of the school asked her to proofread a speech she let him have it. He said he would get the speech back and it would be covered with red marks. My mom told him, “You wanted me to fix it.” She could do anything she put her mind to and all the while she never thought about herself. My mother thought of herself the least; and always thought of others the most. (Antithesis)

My family attended 3 different churches during my childhood. My mother seemed to have an angelic way about her that spread throughout each church we attended. She would quickly become apart of a small group, the choir, and also lead youth groups as well as heading up events. She was also able to get members of the church to join in and participate. I’m talking about the members that sit and don’t want to be moved. She would end up getting the grumpiest old men that always sat in the back to participate in a skit or a play. It was amazing to me that people were just drawn to her and they wanted to listen and follow what she was saying. My mother was an example of the kind of person each one of us should strive to be. She got in the action and became a leader. Her life was full and she used her talents and skills to help me as well as so many others.

My mother’s greatest talent was her voice. She loved to sing all the time. I can remember her singing to me when I was younger and I couldn’t fall asleep. I’m not fortunate enough to have a nice singing voice but I did get into music because of my mother and I can play the guitar pretty well. My mother always encouraged me to try new things and not be afraid of failing.

I’m paying tribute to a woman who put her wants and needs aside to provide and take care of me. She was my biggest fan. From little league baseball to graduating high school and everything in between my mother was always there to offer support, encouragement, and love. It’s easy to think about ourselves all the time instead of others. My mom taught me that there’s no greater feeling than helping someone else. As I said earlier my mom died of cancer. But she didn’t go out without a fight. When she first developed lung cancer she had surgery to have the tumor removed. It is the second worst surgery to recover from. After the surgery the doctor said, “She is as pretty on the inside as she is on the outside. For the next few months she had to undergo chemotherapy. I’m not sure of the name but the doctors say it’s the worst kind of chemotherapy as person can undergo. She was told she needed to take 4 trials and that most people can only make it through 3. My mom looked the doctor in the eye and said I have 3 reasons to make it through talking about me, my dad and my sister. She made it through all 4 trials and we thought we were out of the woods. But the cancer came back and my mom ended up going to Chicago to undergo more chemotherapy and begin radiation. It amazed me how my mother always tried to sound happy and energetic on the phone when I knew she must have been in so much pain. The chemotherapy and radiation was successful in removing the section it was aimed at but more cancer appeared throughout her body. I later found out that my mother kept this from me to protect me and she still remained positive. Through the chemo my mother showed strength; through the radiation my mother showed strength; through the entire process my mother showed strength.(Epistrophe) She always thought about me and my sister and trying to not make us worry. As far as I’m concerned my mother won the battle and I can’t wait to see her again. Her faith was incredible. Each day, my mother, read the bible. (Parallelism) The biggest blessing was the help and their support (Synecdoche) throughout the process.

I could go on all night about the special things my mother did in her life. She loved God. She loved family. She loved friends.(anaphora) My mother was one of the most spiritual people I knew always praying about things instead of worrying all the time. She had so many friends that loved her and she was the best friend you could have.