Sample essay responses

After reading Signs of Life in the USA pages 25-44, select one of the three student essays and provide a thorough response to it to this blog entry. You should address issues such as why the essay was effective/ineffective, what you would do differently if you were in a similar writing situation, where research or other evidence was used well or where it was needed, and so forth. Please post your response before class on Monday (9/19).

Patrons of the Arts

I really thought this essay was very well written. I thought it was effective because it addressed many issues that are so true in our society today. For example, she talked a lot about comforming to role models such as celebrities and rock stars. I think this was such a great way to express her point of why tatoos and piercings are the so-called "norm" today in our society. She made a very good point by discussing the issue of how in the past, it was considered wrong or rebellious for women to have tatoos and piercings on their body and now it's a form of sexuality. Now it's considered normal for woman to have one or mulitple tatoos or piercings. If I were in a simliar writing situation I probably would have addressed many of the issues she did. I definitely would have discussed the issues of celebrities and the so-called general culture trend of why people are getting tatoos and piercings. I probably would have added a little more on how tatoos, especially, and piercings are a form of our sexuality today in our society. She briefly talks about it and I probably would have gone more in depth with it. I think that since this was a personal expierence essay she presented the information very well. The evidence she used to support her topic was clearly stated and I like how she made the point of putting other cultures and societies, especially Indian women and how covering up their bodies is a sacred symbol for them. It made good supporting evidece, I thought. I chose to pick this essay because I feel that writing a personal expierence essay would really have great outcomes. I think these kind of essays are extremely interesting to read and relating culture to yourself is one of the easiest things to do.

A Mirror to our Universe

Science Fiction: A Mirror to our Universe is an excellent essay that flawlessly shows the process of semiotics in action. The author uses popular culture, in this case science fiction TV programs, to show how our view of the future is based upon our culture of the present. He notes how several episodes of Star Trek reflect on issues of racism, terrorism, capital punishment, genetical engineering, and gender roles that we find ourselves arguing about today. The author was very effective in stating that science fiction is the perfect background to tackle controversial issues. I can't imagine any improvements that can be made, and the author used extensive research to support his thesis, such as how historical texts like Don Quixote used satire to discuss current issues of that time. This essay is a perfect example to follow when writing a semiotic paper.

Response to Patrons of the Arts.

After reading the essay, Patrons of the Arts I was very impressed with the writers essay. I thought the personal experience story made it very effective. She is not only speaking her opinion, she is also speaking from experience. Experience makes this very effective because it raises her level of expertise. She not only uses her experience, but also the experience of her mother and friend. This also adds to the effectiveness of the essay.
This essay starts out telling a story from personal experience. It then suddenly switches to expressing personal opinion. This takes aaway from the effectiveness of the essay. This could be improved by sticking to one subject.
I think that the research was adequete. It could be greatly improved with better organization. It seems that the essay jumps around to different research topics making it hard to read.

Patrons of the Arts

This essay described the event of body piercings and tattoos becoming more popular in society. These symbols are not of rebellion anymore but, rather individualism. This essay was written out of personal experience and helped readers relate to the idea better. Readers were reading about a real life story. The essay was simply about observations and experience. There was little research and factual information. In the end of the essay the narrator still had no idea of why she wanted a tattoo. She still did not know what the appeal of the tatatoo was. She mentioned some ideas such as being individual in a diverse world, the sex appeal, and eroticism. However, what is the main reason that body piercings and tatattoos have so much appeal? What made these acts, once thought to be freakish, so appealing and appropriate now?

Patron of the Arts

One of the key aspects of this essay was the author’s experience. The author had a tattoo and so did her mother. This gave the author creditability as well as making a good introduction for the story. A couple problems occurred with this though. The first problem was more of a structure problem, when she transitioned between the subjects it was kind of choppy. The other problem that occurred was at the end. In the last sentenced she mentioned she still didn’t know why she got it. In my opinion she lost all credibility because she couldn’t explain her own actions. So it made me wonder how she could explain others. When I finished reading the essay I felt that it did not improve my intellect.

Patrons of the Arts

Out of the three essays that were required to read I chose Patrons of the Arts as my essay. This particular essay was about the experience of a 18 year old girl that was getting a tattoo. This essay stood out because of the information in the essay was from a first hand experience. This makes the essay more interesting to read because it is based on real life information. I thought that this essay was written very well. The way that the author compared stars to realistic people was a very good idea. The only thing I would change is the midlife crisis part. I belive that everybody goes though this but it does not involve rebelling against society.


The essay, Patrons of the Acts, was effective because it gave specific details and personal experiences. It talked about the popular culture of self expression through piercings and tattoos. However, the essay was not very clear and her point was not well established. It said that her paper was a narrative, but it kind of seemed like it was also a persuasive paper. It was a good paper, but I think she should have continued to stick with her narrative. I think it was effective because of her personal experinces stated in the essay. I thought it was ineffective however because it was not clear what type of paper it was and in the end she did not close it with a strong statement.

Patron of the Arts essay

I thought that the Patron of the Arts was an effective paper because the writer included personal experiences and also did include some research information on the topic of tattoos. I also liked the way it was written it wasn't like the typical essays read in a class.It was written in a way that you would see in a normal setting and not just written for a teacher.

Patrons of the arts is about

Patrons of the arts is about an 18 year old girl that was getting a tattoo. I picked this essay because i felt it was easy to relate to because the girl was my age and tattoos are a huge craze right now especially for the 18-21 aged. I also thought this essay was written very well. There really wasnt anything in this essay that i felt was ineffective or that needed more evidence. The essay like i said earlier was written extremely well.

patron of the arts

I believe that this essay was very well written. There was a really good 'attention-getter" at the beginning, where she told her story of the day she went to get her tatoo, and the experience that went along with it. She touched on some very good points, too. Many people are influenced by celebrities and rock-and-roll stars, which may have very well helped bring upon this revolution of tatoos. She also mentioned her mothers mid-life crisis. Some people may decide to get tatoos because it will 'make them feel younger'. More and more we hear about these mid-life crises and more and more people try to compensate their age with a car, a motorcycle, a vacation, a TATOO. In some cases, it is also identity change/rebellion. Sometimes, teens-to mid 20 year olds want to change thier identity, or are tired of confroming. She gave a perfect example for this exact situation. Her form of research was personal experience. She used it well and to its fullest to help bring out her point. However, if I were writing this report, I would have also given a better example of influence used as a reason for a tatoo.

Patrons of the Arts

I think this essay was very organized. It grabbed your attention from the very begining with a story-like introduction. It really talks about the trend of teens and young adults these days; really wanting to get tattoos and piercings everywhere. It is the norm today where as back in the day, it was the minority. I really liked how well written and organized the essay was, as well as the attention grabbing effect.

patrons of the arts

I thought this essay was written very well. It was put together in a very well organized way. It had all the piece of a great essay. I feel that it is an effective essay for people my age. As a whole a very good essay.

essay response.."Patrons of the Arts"

I believe the essay "Patrons of the Arts" was effective in explaining how tatooing and body piercing were once symbols of nonconformity and have now become more acceptable by society. The author used personal experience to add dimension to the essay and she explored four explanations to prove her primary argument.One explanation is that celebrities have been getting tatoos, so the public has gained an interest. To summarize the last three reasons, baby-boomers get tatoos because of a mid-life crisis, globalization of the world has had an influence, and people want to establish an identity. This evidence/research was very supportive, and made the essay very effective. If I were in this writing situation, I would give personal reasons as to why people get tatoos or body piercings. For example, for some people it is a way to deal with tragedy, family deaths, experience in war, etc. Also researching the orgin of tatoos would add to the essay.

kdrinnen patron of the arts

this essay was pretty interesting to read. it was well-written, and possibly my favotite aspect was the author's including of her experience of having a tattoo, along with her mother. that seems to give her a better platform to discuss tattoos and piercings and the why of it all. not only was this essay written clearly, the reasons presented for the tattoos and piercings were enlightening. i probably would not have done things a whole lot different had i been writing it.

Personal Experience Essay

“Patrons of the Arts” is a personal experience essay that explains a girl’s personal account of her struggle of deciding whether or not she wants a tattoo. In the essay, the author explains how tattoos today are not so much a sign of rebellion, but rather an expression of an artistic side of a person. She expands on how the stereotypical, rough crowd is not the only ones with tattoos. The author gives her own views on the influence others give tattoos, while also giving a personal influence coming from her mother. This essay is effective in explaining different reasons for getting a tattoo, and likewise explains how this has become an acceptable part of the culture. This essay is ineffective in the sense that the author writes the reasons other people get tattoos, but fails to explain the reasoning behind her decision in getting a tattoo. It seems as if the culture is too much of an influence on her, and her identity is not fully there. I would add a little bit more personal reasoning of why I would be getting a tattoo and what it would represent.

Science fiction

The future to come and the present to be. I like the essay, it explains much of what scince fiction trys to get across to us. i beilve the explainaiton of rasicm and the demoniaton of man are the strong points elflected in the essay. The resarch is done whell, stating many movies, but mostly consentrates on Star-Trek for the sources. I would of included more movies and present day Sci-Fi movies, to compare and contrast to out of date films. I would of also like to hear about why people watch sci-fi,is the act of seeing the future, or our imagination coming to life. For myself it is a world that is far from the present, and one which bogels the mind.